Falling in love

It is fall. I can't put my finger on which leaf has turned over recently, but something has changed. I am finally coming out of the undulating emotions that have paralleled my sleep deprivation in the last three years. It's not just the seasons changing, but it does seems appropriate with the holidays upon us that I am feeling more Joy and Gratefulness on a consistent basis. And it is wonderful. I am falling more in love with my toddlers and our simple daily activities more than ever before. The only thing that would make it better would be to throw a river, mountain, and forest in our backyard and then we'd be true adventurers. 

When I was childless I always thought that parents spoke of their children as opposites. Like one is wild, the other quiet, conservative. Well, that's certainly not true around here. Neither stop. Ever. There is no timid  little princess to be found in our home. Instead you can find them on top of things. If they are near to the ground, which is rare, then most likely there are wheels under them. (In our annoyingly tiny garage we have 68 wheels - bikes, skates, boards, wagons, strollers). Don't get me wrong, I love it. If we end up with a little gromette that becomes a professional surfer or a world trotting mountain climber then I will not just be stoked, but I will be trotting along right behind them. The only problem that comes with this is the unnerving anxiety that accompanies all of this. I am sure it is a combination of working in an ER and motherhood, but it is rare that anything streams through my mind without constantly thinking of worst-case-scenarios. 

Ava. 15 months

At 13 months, Ava started walking, then riding on a scooter by 15 months. The other day Robby found her in the bathroom sitting on top of the tank of the toilet. At the end of the summer when we spent every day in Nani and Papas pool, she just walked off the step like she could confidently swim. She charges right into San Diego bay the same way, at our favorite little spot, Kellogg beach. Recently she went from literally only saying "doggy" or "daddy" ?  in reference to everything, to sounding out all kinds of words. She is also becoming more cuddly, which is adorable. 

Riley. 3 years

Riley would only wear underwear everyday, everywhere if it were up to her. Although when she must get dressed, she has recently become very proud of herself for dressing herself. She also would only eat chocolate if she decided her diet. I could write a book on the things she says alone. It is hilarious listening to a 3 year old develop grammar and form sentences about what goes on in their little heads. She loves riding her bike. It's one of those gliders. About a month ago the gliding idea just clicked and now she just picks up her feet and goes all the way down the street without putting her feet down. It's a huge accomplishment for her and us. Now we can go on rides around the neighborhood, with Ava on the handlebar seat and Riley riding by herself. It's these kinds of things that are so fulfilling to me. She loves crafts or "projects" as she refers to them. Which is also very easy for me. She loves playing pretend "Okay, now you're mama and I'm the kid." Another huge summertime accomplishment was her ability to swim like a fishy. Thanks to her lessons she became such  a good swimmer! Next up, I cannot wait til they are just a touch older and we can have campouts in the backyard and sleepovers with their cousin Luna. 

With the girls being a tiny bit older and independent, Robby and I have been able to take a little more time to ourselves. We went to Portland for a long weekend, just the 2 of us, in September. Having no responsibility or schedule for a few days was surreal. I also did a little local beach camping with some amazing girlfriends. 

I know one day I will look back at these days and wish for the simple stressors that come with little girls instead of more grown up worries. I was driving home from the beach one day this summer when it dawned on me that once Riley starts full time school then this 12 year run of never being committed to a Monday through Friday schedule of mine will come to an end. Since college I have never had a job with a "normal" schedule. Iv'e been able to come and go as I please. The thought that one day soon I won't be able to travel with the girls whenever or go the beach in a moment's notice was shocking initially. I try to appreciate our lax days since this. I try not to judge myself for not being a teaching type of mom. If I were to attempt homeschooling, my children would end up as bohemian artists. 

All of the cousins celebrating my dad's 70th birthday with a surprise party (above). We started out fall at Oma's Farm (below). 

After I posted the other day, I remembered a few more milestones and events that I had forgotten. In September, we had a combined birthday party for the girls at the Waterfront park in San Diego, then that night Riley got so sick with croup that she had to go to Children's ER in the middle of the night because she couldn't breath. The following night, Ava, at 13 months, climbed out of her crib. These girls, I swear.